Bro?
“Come at me Bro!’, “Bros before ho’s”, and “the BroCode.” All of these sentences have one blatantly evident similarity: the word “Bro”. As the word seeps into everyday use, one can’t help but wonder: what is a Bro? From frat boys to drama geeks, this (typically) male label is applied to so many variants of the modern male spectrum, breaking down social barriers previously thought impregnable. The question still stands: Who or what are Bros, and how can you tells who is a Bro?
It doesn’t take a literary genius to realize the Bro derives from “brother”, but it does take an adept observer to realize the difference. Brother, defined by Merriam-Webster’s dictionary, means “a male who has the same parents as another or one parent in common with another”, but Bros don’t (usually) share parents. Through their own life, Bros meet each other, and become Bros. But can someone become a Bro? Some may be born Bros, but many become them through following the Articles of The Bro Code, a book that contains every and all the de facto rules for interaction between Bros, and how a Bro lives.It establishes the “Wingman” (Kuhn 24), a partner in crime and a side-kick in picking up girls (which would appear to be the main focus of Bros).
Just because Bro and brother both refer directly to male comrades doesn’t necessarily mean females haven’t or can’t become “Bros”. In fact, in the “holy” text of Bros, known as The Bro Code clearly states in Article 22: “There is no law that prohibits a woman from being a Bro.” (34) While this article comes into conflict with Article 4: “A Bro never divulges the existence of the Bro Code to a woman.” (14), it can be assumed that once a woman has made the transition from the role of chick into the role of Bro based on the Bro-chick dichotomy, The Bro Code may be revealed to her. But that begs the question: What makes a Bro a Bro?
A Bro will never grow a mustache, never splits a desert with fellow Bros, never comparison shops, never wears pink.Bros never cuddle, nor share a hotel bed if couches or the floorare available. A Bro isn’t vegetarian, he isn’t a spell-checker, he doesn’t reveal the scores of sport games, he doesn’t leave a Bro without posted bail (unless it’s crazy expensive), and he doesn’t accept help from his fellow Bros when he’s carrying things (except expensive TVs or moving anything into an expensive car). Bros follow these constraints not only to the word, but willingly.
A Bro is more than a friend. He is the kind of person trusted with secrets, delicate tasks, and your car. A Bro is the friend that is there for you because he needs you to help him move, but will only compensate you with lunch. A Bro is always psyched, even if he isn’t, because that’s what his Bros need him to be. A Bro will ask you if you need help, even if he doesn’t plan to ever give it, because you shouldn’t really need it. A Bro is, essentially, a brother from another mother. But how does one differentiate a Bro from the rest of the crowd?
There are several distinct methods one can use to determine if someone is a Bro or not. One favorite method is something called the “Bro-five”. These can be as simple as the commonhigh five to something as complex and intricate as the Atomic High Five, but are all assured signs of Bros. Or rather, they were. The act of the high five has unknown origins and so it is difficult to determine with any certainty if the Bro and the high five have a shared creation, but it can be certain that a high five or fist bump is an act performed between two Bros. The act of the Bro-five is so important to Bro-culture that Article 107 ofThe Bro Code forbids a Bro from leaving another Bro “hanging”, or without a high five or fist bump (138)
While the Bros can be sifted out through the crowd with the Bro-five, the only true way to determine whether or not someone is a Bro is by becoming their Bro. By becoming someone’s Bro, the complete understanding of what a makes a Bro a Bro is revealed: love. Sure, it’s sappy, but it’s the truth. Love is what keeps a Bro going for his Bros, and keeps him in line with The Code. It’s not just a mutual arrangement that keeps Bros together, but a mutual caring towards each other (and doesn’t that make you want to break Article 41: “A Bro never cries.”) that allows for such a close and strong relationship between Bros (59).
Bros: the best friend of a lonely dude, but the worst enemy of the bachelorette party. A semi-hidden world that exists around us, where Wingmen and Bros leading the charge against the single occupants of bars and clubs everywhere. Some call it noble, others disgusting, but it’s truly a beauty of nature (yeah, it’s disgusting). People can go their whole lives, never seeing a Bro, but know that they’re out there, in the frat houses and the male dressing rooms, always looking out for each other, and wearing their hats either in a 12 o’clock or 6 o’clock fashion.
So, I realize what happened. I clicked publish last night, but it didn't work (for some strange reason). Just so we're all aware, this was finished before Wednesday! I just didn't check to see if it went up. Sorry.
And now a poem and a quote
The Next Day
Many people dream of the next day
the one the follows our sleep
the one filled with unknown
it rises when we do
full of hope and promise
Many people wait for the next day
the one that the need to go on
the one that says a is better
it rises when we do
full of hope and promise
Many people waste this day
the one that happens right now
the one that we waited for last
it rose when we did
ignored for tomorrow
-JD Galuardi
"The higher the monkey climbs the more he shows his behind"- Zora Neale Hurston, Their Eyes Were Watching God
Works Cited
"Brother." Merriam-Webster. Merriam-Webster, n.d. Web. 03 Mar. 2014.
Kuhn, Matt. The Bro Code. New York: Fireside, 2008. Print.
