Wednesday #26 - Where's My Dead Body

Hey Dreamers! Do you realize what today is? It's the halfway mark! The year is halfway over already. Man, it feels like it was only 26 weeks ago that I decided to get back into blogging in the wee hours of the morning (there is a cat sitting on my hand as I am typing this), and now look at us: we made it to summer, we finished the school year, and we've survived to the halfway mark! It's all downhill from here (and that could mean either it's going to be progressively easier or harder as the year runs to completion...). That little piece of congratulations aside, let's talk about something this week, shall we?

Where Is My Dead Body?!?

     In role-playing video games (RPGs), it is a common practice to level up the world around the PC as they level up (i.e. when you reach level 10, the enemies that you'll fight are also level 10). In addition to the monsters, the equipment available to the PC increases in strength and value and such. For the purposes of this theory, I'll be using the game Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim for my examples.

Now that we know this, my question is: where are the dead bodies?

    If it takes fighting things to level up, therefore causing an increase to your knowledge in combat and your abilities characterized by a level up, it essentially takes dead bodies. And when you get to the higher levels of a game, it can take a lot of dead bodies. As one plays the game, we can see the dead bodies that the PC (player character, that's you) generates on their adventure, and we can also observe that the number of dead bodies per level up grows from level to level at an exponential rate (what once took 10 dead bodies to create now takes 100). Because we witness the creation of the dead bodies, we can easily understand how we became so strong. But, we don't ever get to see how the enemies get that way...

     According to the Elder Scrolls Wiki, "Hold Guards level with the Dragonborn until around level 50," which means that they are fighting things throughout that time, causing them to level up in accordance to the level of the main character, but for them to become that powerful, the guards would've had to have killed things to get that strong (either that, or a race of people notorious for their distrust of magic and their distaste for thieves would have to become very skilled in Lockpicking, Pick-Pocketing, Conjuration, Illusion, Alteration, and Sneaking). And this isn't just true of the guards. What about the bandits? They level with the PC until about level 28, but where are the bodies that they killed to get to be that level? The Draugr (ancient mummy Nords) are excusable, because they're from a different time, and are now raised dead,but what about the vampires? Or the Thugs that attack you? Or the Forsworn? All of these enemies level with the PC, but we never see the bodies! The only explanation that I have for this is that somewhere, of the shores of Tamriel, is a giant man-made island of dead bodies. And right next to it is the mound of weapons and armor.

     Not only do the enemies level up proportionally to the PC, but so do the available weaponry and armor. When the game begins, everyone has dinky little Iron weapons and armor, or fur armor, but by level 50, characters are toting around Elven and Dwarven and Glass and Ebony weapons! Where did they come from?!? Why didn't they have them before hand? The PC would've been dead so early on if the damn bandits used the Daedric Greatsword that was lying in their cave when the PC was level 3, instead of waiting until level 64. And where do the old weapons go? They have to go somewhere, especially if every month or so the entire population of Skyrim is upgrading (sure, it's mostly bandits, but still). 

     The only logical conclusion that we can make from this is that there is a massive mound of weapons, armor, and dead bodies polluting the oceans of Tamriel. Yep. That's gotta be it.

 Hearken now, sons of snow, to an age, long ago,
And the tale, boldly told, of the one!
Who was kin to both wyrm, and the races of man,
With a power to rival the sun!

And the voice, he did wield, on that glorious field,
When great Tamriel shuddered with war!
Mighty Thu'um, like a blade, cut through enemies all,
As the Dragonborn issued his roar!

And the Scrolls have foretold, of black wings in the cold,
That when brothers wage war come unfurled!
Alduin, Bane of Kings, ancient shadow unbound,
With a hunger to swallow the world!

But a day, shall arise, when the dark dragon's lies,
Will be silenced forever and then!
Fair Skyrim will be free from foul Alduin's maw!
Dragonborn be the savior of men!

Dragonborn, Dragonborn, by his honor is sworn,
To keep evil forever at bay!
And the fiercest foes rout when they hear triumph's shout,
Dragonborn, for your blessing we pray!

-The Song of the Dragonborn

Jeremy Soule

"Sky above, Voice within." -Arngeir, Skyrim, 2011